Waiting To Feel Something

On Friday, my mother told me that my paternal grandfather died.

I wasn't close to him, meeting him once in the early 1980's, and speaking to him a dozen times on the phone after that. He wasn't a presence in my life, and was a disruptive presence in my father's childhood (perhaps something that echoed down into mine? Tough to tell what we can blame on our parents).

I basically tried not to think about it all weekend. On Sunday after Meeting, SS talked briefly about her relationships with her family, and it was all I could do to not blurt all of the above out.

At this point, I'm wondering if I'm going to get a surprise reaction, and if it means that I'm broken if I don't.