O: Hey, L and J are dating.
Me: Why do people assume that dance partners are going to date? That's not fair to anyone.
O: Well, they changed status on facebook.
Me: That's doesn't mean anything. People put all kinds of stuff on facebook. Our friend A's status is "married" to a gal in a different city. Doesn't make it true.
O: They just kissed.
Me: Dammit! There goes my shot.
O: What?! Aren't you dating someone?
Me: Yes, but I want all attractive women I know to be single as my reserve dating pool.
O: Really?
Me: No, not really. Can we talk about this later? Like, after gym class?
O: Are you saying I'm acting like we're in high school.
Me: Yes.
I get all the best lines when I embellish a true story in the retelling.
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