me: How are you legs feeling?
LB: My leg's are fine, but my butt is killing me!
me: Don't worry, that goes away pretty quickly. Probably by Wednesday.
me: By the way, I've always wanted to say this in a socially acceptable way: Don't worry, a couple of rides and we'll toughen that ass right up!
Of course the entire experience let me use an old standby before the ride:
me: Put the Chamois Butt'r on the chamois on your shorts, then put more on your crotch. Believe me you want to avoid the chafing.
[LB retreats to bathroom to follow instructions, then returns]
LB: Well that was an interesting experience.
me: I once answered the phone when I was in the middle of doing that, but didn't have the courage to answer "So what's up?" with "Nothing much, just lubing up my crotch."
T.M.I.
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